FROM THE COMMENTS
It appears that some men have pure orgasms (those without ejaculation) occasionally but not regularly. Maybe the “Any Man Can..” Book will help.
Women seem to “get” the blog more than men and often ask how they get their husband/partner interested in improving their sex life. The only advice I am comfortable giving is to urge you to accept responsibility for changing things. That doesn’t mean you should take blame for the problem and get all guilt-ridden about it Its nobody’s fault and that never helps. It happens because expectations are too low – especially among men. But, if you assume responsibility for changing the status quo, you are much more likely to do it rather than just waiting for him to change. And, don’t tell anyone what you’re doing! I don’t know why but when we start talking about things like this that we want to do, they tend to go away. Be patient – he’s just a man. Make small changes in your routine and your responses. If you can, get him to read the blog. Make it a little secret game you’re playing. Have fun with it. Wave your stuff around!
The “PMS Sex” discussion in an earlier post generated some interest – mostly from women. One comment was, “I don’t get PMS, but if I ever do we’ll try to take it for a ride!” Some wondered who initiated PMS sex the first time for us, me or G…how did we discover it? I don’t really recall how that happened but there’s a 99.999% certainty that it wasn’t me who initiated it. I’m not that brave. I suspect G just got PMS Horny and grabbed me. Worked out well for both of us.
By the way, I have an off-the-wall theory about PMS. You may recall my description of the cramped sphincter muscle in G’s vagina and how her PMS seemed to vanish when that muscle relaxed after a few orgasms. The personality change symptoms of PMS are very similar to those associated with some constipation – irritability grumpyness, aggressiveness. Is it possible that a cramped sphincter doesn’t generate enough pain to be noticeable but enough to just irritate the living hell out of you?
SPEAKING OF ORGASMS – You know how, when you don’t reboot your computer for awhile it gets bogged down? Maybe an orgasm is a kind of reboot for the brain. It clears out the clutter.
THE “BIRDS & THE BEES” TALK AIN’T WHAT IT USED TO BE!
I guess it’s clear to everyone to everyone by now that the basic rules of conduct between men and women are changing quickly in this me-too world. We are groping our way blindly (Not that kind of groping! Not anymore!) into what is almost certainly a major social tsunami that is going to change everything. It won’t be an easy transition for lots of men and women but its coming and it is long overdue.
I’m sure those of you who have children, especially boys, entering the age of sexual curiosity know you are going to have to caution them but are probably not sure what to tell them. It’s a bit dangerous out there. Think about using this blog. There’s nothing sexually descriptive here that most coming-of-age boys haven’t seen before and the underlying message is that real sex is a lot more than just gettin laid.
MUSIC-IN-THE-BEDROOM UPDATE
We have had the blue toothed sound bar under the head of the bed for several weeks, now, and we have both come to enjoy it very much. Our first fucking music from years ago was “Al Green’s Greatest Hits” turned up real loud in the living room so we could hear it in the bedroom. That still works for us but we subscribe to a streaming music service, now, so we have access to entire worlds of music that we never have before. Mostly we enjoy the romantic ballads of Nat Cole, Sarah Vaughn, Sinatra, Billie Holiday, Julie London.
MORE PHASINATING PHACTS ABOUT PHEROMONES
This is related to what I wrote in an early post about my attraction to Gs pheromones – especially those emanating from her Mons. I just finished a book about those mysterious wafting concoctions entitled “The Scent of Eros” by James Vaughn Kohl and Robert T. Francoeur. It seems that pheromones’ influence on our lives go way beyond the sexual attraction we usually associate with them. There are actually all kinds of pheromones that do all kinds of important things. Some attract the opposite sex but others may just communicate from one part of your body to another part to trigger a needed response.
The pheromone system is not really part of the olfactory system. It has completely different receptors in the nose from those that detect odors. We walk around giving ourselves and everybody in our general vicinity secret little messages that we send, receive and act upon without even being aware of it. It’s almost like a sixth sense that operates at a subconscious level.
We apparently walk around all the time in a cloud of pheromones, dead skin, aerosols from respiration and fur. Yes, fur. We have as many hair follicles on our bodies as any mammal our size. Some of the follicles grow hair. The rest – most – produce microscopic fur which is shed constantly and joins the invisible but potent cloud that swirls around us all the time. I thought knowing this might make help you better appreciate the masks we’re all wearing in public these days.
And, finally, please recommend this blog to your friends if you think it appropriate to do so and, if you comment or email me, it would be good to know how you discovered our blog. Thanks G & R
lovers4life 
It’s interesting — I’ve been sleeping with a trans woman who recently went on hormones, and she has begun having what you call pure orgasms. However, I’ve also been the first to treat her member as though it were a clitoris, focusing primarily on the head area and doing more circular motions instead of stroking the shaft. So which is responsible for the multiorgasmic experience? The motions or the hormones? Or both? Something someone wiser than I should study I think.
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I agree that these things should be studied. My only thought about this is that, being 78, my hormone level is certainly not what it was when I began having “pure” orgasms 30-some years ago but my orgasms are just as intense. That would lead me to believe it is the motion rather than the hormones. On the other hand, there is certainly a learning process for me and G – me, learning how to control the orgasm, and, her, getting better at producing it – both of which enhances it. Just keep playing. Enjoy it.
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